flori inainte de pasti ... flori de florii

lunch with Caleb

Lucru si echilibru

Am primit o promovare. Nu ce-a dorita, dar probabil una mai interesanta. M-au felicitat pe rand colegii, dar nu am simtit nici o anume buvurie. Stiu ca au fost mai multi candidati, si e greu sa te bucuri cand chiar langa tine cineva e dezamagit.
E valtoare mare la lucru, schimari dramatice, unele nebine primie de colegi. Majoritatea.
Avem un credo, ca ici in compania asta cea mai importanta resursa sunt oamenii, sufletul companiei. Dar mi se pare ca empatia lipseste, cand momentan doar se urmeaza niste comenzi de sus, si managerii abia isi trag ei sufletul in aplicarea acestor ordine.

In fine, stresul si frustrarea dintre colegi a declansat facatorul de pace din mine. Si vad lucruri care nu ma afecteaza in mod direct, dar n ma pot abtine sa nu ma doara. Probabil ca in parte e si un dram de mandrie, ca pot judeca lucrurile la rece, pentru ca nu sunt implicata direct, sau aceste fapte nu ma afecteaza direct pe mine. Cum ar fi taierea orelor, si stagnarea intr-o pozitie fara recunoasterea meritelor. Dar acum, tot ce pot zice ii ca nu imi chiar doresc sa lucrez asa de mult, si m-as bucura sa am mai putine ore de lucru, chiar daca asta inseamna un salariu mai mic. plata pe ora e asa insignificanta, ca nu ar face o mare diferenta.
Iar pe de alta parte, promovarea asta nu a schimbat nimic, decat numarul responsabilitatilor mele. Acum sunt in cursa de pregatire pentru geniu de raparari si transferuri intre calculatoare, si clase de 1la1.
Imbratisam schimbarea, ca uneoro ne-o dorim cu ardoare, alteori nu avem incotro... dar in ziua de azi stagnarea inseamna regres, si in nici un caz nu putem regresa.

Ce stiu eu... scriu in ro,aneste acum pentru ca asa mi-e de obosita mintea ca abia mai pot gandi. Azi am liber, desi ieri deodata am aparut ca si cand sunt programata pentru 5 clase diferite. Sa-ti imaginezi ce soc! Dar managerul mi-a confirmat ca pot avea ziua libera. E nevoie de un balans intre munca si familie si relaxare. Si de obicei am un echilibru bun, dar inevitabil imi mai e distrasa atentia de entuziasmul de la lucru.

De altfel, azi vreau sa pictez, si sa imi relaxsez mintea. :) si tre sa erg la cumparaturi de mancare de asemenea.
Alaltaieri m-am vazut cu maggie si caleb. Au venit sa ma viziteze. si ce bine a fost! si caleb imi zice numele acum. Ce drag mi-e pruncul asta!

Azi e vinerea mare. si imi pare bine ca am liber. am ocazia sa imi odihnesc gandurile si sa ma gandesc la invierea lui Isus ce va sa vina. Sa ma gandesc la lucrurile care conteaza.
Desi m-am oferit sa vin la lucru, ma bucur ca mi s-a spus ca e dreptul meu sa ma odihnesc si sa am ziua libera.

Promovare si slujire

I had my interview today, for the promotion to the creative position. Rather rushed between two classes I had to teach, but it was a good meeting.
The general manager said as we were getting started: "two days ago you had a class with a man who's name is X. That my father in law." and he said that with a serious face. Couldn't preditct what was going to follow. The the manager said: "we had dinner with him that evening, and he wouldnt stop raving about you. You impressed him. He felt like a king: listened and important. You impressed him with your humility." I don't know how that sounds, but I serve when I teach. Hristos a venit in lume sa slujeasca, nu sa fie slujit. E o Asa eliberare cand nu suntem dependenti de actiunile altora. Suntem liberi sa slujim. Si cand o facem cu drag Si de buna voie, minini au loc.

Junior high topic this month

Beauty. 
Our creator is the master of making beauty. He created us all in his image. We didn't earn our beauty, thus it belongs to God, and we ought to use it for his glory nor for our own benefit: like popularity and power. 
The beauty that lasts and is constantly enhanced as the time goes by is the inner beauty, mind beauty, soul beauty, shared through words, actions and kind, joyful eye-contact. 

Aware

I am afraid sometimes that all these thoughts i have will make me be smug about life. And then inevitably, humbling events come our way. 

My joyful perspective over life is at times inappropriate, given all the sad hard events happening around me. And yet, I can't deny I have a joyful hopeful heart. I pray I won't step on any toes with it. 

Writing things down I can face bluntly what is going on in my head. Sometimes it is scary. Pride is a disease, depression on an ongoing basis is not healthy either. Embracing who we are, and yet not giving up on bettering ourselves... Loving our neighbor, serving others, being gracious, being generous, drawing our joy from God and from within, for he is welcomed and present inside ourselves. 

Self-sufficiency

Being self-sufficient when you are sick or unemployed, is out of question. It's our ego burdening us even more, to be or appear as something that is beyond draining for us to keep up such independent appearance.  

We we not meant to be self-dufficient. God allowed numerous circumstance to humble us, to make us realize how fragile we are, to learn to rely on god, and not only. Hardship is an opportunity for friends and family to love and serve. Why would one deprive those that love us of the opportunity to share and increase the grace. 

I love what god teaches us through the most unexpected circumstances, And sometimes the most uncomfortable...